Rewritten Lyrics – “Touch My Brownies”

As I may have previously mentioned, one of the things I like to do when I get bored is rewrite lyrics to songs. Rarely do they ever get past that initial stage, though I did try to record this one once and I’ve got another song for which most of the music video has been shot. But since this one isn’t like to see the light of day I thought I’d share it with you.

The original song is “Touch My Body” by Mariah Carey, a karaoke version of which I've imbedded below in case you want to try and sing along.



[Note: My lyrics would kick in at the 17 second mark in the video]

I know that you've been waiting for it
I'm waiting too
In my imagination I’d be cooking for you
I’ve got the oven preset for
Three hundred and two
And my KitchenAid is ready
For whatever I’ll do.

You’d better bring your appetite
If you gonna let me cook
For you-ou (you-ou)

You’d better bring your appetite
‘Cause my culinary skills are
All “Mon Dieu!” (“Mon Dieu!”)

But if you share my recipe
You won’t be getting anymore
That shit just ain’t cool

Girl I promise you’ll be jonesing
For the things I’ve got in store

So come on over
And give it a try

Touch my brownies
Use them for some S’mores
Have them a la carte
Baby they’re all yours

Touch my brownies
They’ve got chocolate chips
A swirl of caramel
Taste it on your lips

Touch my brownies
Eat them all day long
Don’t try to resist
Temptation is too strong

Touch my brownies
No one has to know
Just keep this info on the down low
And touch my brownies

You won't want for nothing girl
Just take from me
These brownies have no trans fat
And are calorie free

I know you think that’s crazy
I mean how could that be?
But trust me when I say
That this dessert is guilt free

You’d better bring your appetite
If you gonna let me cook
For you-ou (you-ou)

You’d better bring your appetite
‘Cause my culinary skills are
All “Mon Dieu!” (“Mon Dieu!”)

But if you share my recipe
You won’t be getting anymore
That shit just ain’t cool

Girl I promise you’ll be jonesing
For the things I’ve got in store

So come on over
And give it a try

Touch my brownies
It’s no metaphor
These are hot and fresh
Can’t buy ‘em at the store

Touch my brownies
Rub them on your face
Along with tasting good
they exfoliate

Touch my brownies
You know you want to
Just a little bite
It’ll be all right

Touch my brownies
Else they’ll go to waste
Think of the folks starving every place
And touch my brownies

I’m a culinary Steve McQueen
Girl this stuff is high cuisine
You won’t find this anywhere
Brownies beyond compare

You won’t no knife or fork
Just make sure the wine’s uncorked

Touch my brownies
Use them as you will
I don’t really care
Throw em on the grill

Touch my brownies
They will never end
As long as you’re my super
Secret lady friend

Touch my brownies
This is your last chance
If you want a taste
Come on show some haste

Touch my brownies
They can’t be compared
So come on and taste what I’ve prepared
And touch my brownies

Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah
Oh yeah oh yeah
Oh oh oh oh yeah
Touch my brownies...