Daily Haiku - September 10, 2012

Thinning out the herd
Digital files fall in droves
Sub-par memories.

A Brilliant New Idea!

Many months ago, one of my friends passed me along this link:

http://www.lambentstew.com/webblog/miniproject/steamanalysis

Basically, somebody wrote a script to analyze your Steam account information and throw lots of interesting stats in your face.  For example, I’ve logged 494.8 hours in Sid Meier’s Civilization 5; my total time played while logged into Steam is 1572.50 hours; and I’ve never played 37.7% of the games I own through Steam (43).

Now, those last two factoids are actually wildly incorrect.  According to Steam I’ve never played any of the Half-Life series, nor have I played any of the first six Grand Theft Auto Games.  In some cases this is patently false, while others are half-truths (there are a number of games I originally bought and played outside of Steam, and then later repurchased as a digital copy through Steam for convenience).  There’s also the matter of DLC (downloadable content), which merely adds to a preexisting game rather than being something completely new.

Having said that, it was surprising to manually go through and see how many games I haven’t played, or have played for less than an hour (32 in all).  To rectify this embarrassing situation, I plan on spending one hour on each of these games and then sharing my thoughts with you.  I shall call it, “One (Hour) At a Time.” 

My History of Theatre

The earliest memory I can recall of acting on stage was an abbreviated version of “The Phantom Tollbooth” which we performed in middle school.  The only line I remember having, described a punishment that involved picking away at a mountain of salt with a sewing needle. 

I recall going to an acting camp sometime later in middle school with one of my best friends at the time, but I don’t remember any details beyond not showering for the entire week because they were communal and I was embarrassed to be seen naked.

Fast forward to senior year in high school when I finally got into one of the main stage productions (I had been in one or two one-off shows at school, but I didn’t feel like those really counted).  Admittedly, my inclusion into “The Will Rogers Follies” that year probably had something to do with the majority of the senior class boycotting the show due to drama with the drama teacher (shocker, I know), but one does not look a gift horse in the mouth.

When I got into college I became a lot more prolific, having decided to major in Theatre (alongside Computer Science), and it’s at that point when I actually started my education in the craft.  While I had taken Theatre Arts for four years in high school, I discovered very early into my college education that I hadn’t actually been taught much over the last four years. 

This was made apparent when I went back to high school that first year to see some of friends perform “Little Shop of Horrors.” With only a few months of classes under my belt, I could already see all the glaring problems and shortcomings with the performance onstage.  I wanted to take everyone aside after the show and explain about subtext and motivation and tactics and all the other wonderful nuances about acting that made it so wonderful.  But I did not.  I congratulated them on a great performance and made my way back to college. 

Over the course of my college career I did about a half-dozen shows, and worked tech on about the same number.  And though I never managed to be a particularly good student I did manage to graduate with my BA and weasel my way into an internship up in the Poconos (Pennsylvania) for eight months. 

It was here that I got my first glimpse into the professional actor’s life, getting to live and work side-by-side with professional actors, whose stories of living in New York and traveling on national tours were filled with drugs, sex, humor, wonder and enough adventures to fill up a single life three-fold.  I had no desire to live job-to-job though, and was content to stick with community theatre after my internship was over and I returned to Virginia.  Perhaps it was not as crazy a lifestyle as those held by the professionals, but I’ve had my own share of stories to tell and I’ve enjoyed every minute of it.

I spent the next four years in and out of the community theatre scene in Northern Virginia, right up until I left for California in 2006.  My final huzzah was one of my favorite experiences, “Disney’s Beauty & the Beast,” in which I got to play Fishmonger, Wolf and Salt Shaker as part of a wonderful cast of characters.  I made a ton of friends during the run, and had I not left I’d probably still be in constant contact with all of them today.  But I did leave, and in doing so unwittingly started a six year drought from acting which was only recently ended with my performance in “Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson.” 

But that’s fodder for another post, and this one has already run on longer than I had intended, so I’ll leave things here for today.

Fame never hurt so good.

So I was on Wipeout recently. For those of you not familiar with the ABC show, it’s essentially a giant obstacle course for adults with the promise of a $50,000 cash prize should you be the last man (or woman) standing. My episode, Hillbilly Wipeout, can be seen below.



I had heard of Wipeout before, but hadn’t considering auditioning until one of my friends got on and won the whole thing. I wasn’t sure I’d be allowed to audition because I worked in the television industry, but apparently as long as you aren’t personal friends with anyone at ABC you’re fair game.

So way back in October I went in for the on-camera audition which involved filling out forms for 30 minutes, 3 minutes of actual interviewing (give me your battle cry; why do you want to be on Wipeout?; how do you intend to win?; tell me about your most embarrassing moment; what would you do with the money if you won?) followed by another hour of filling out background checks and medical information.

Obviously they saw something they liked and come April they let me know that the producers had okayed me for an episode and after a quick drug/fitness screening I’d be on my way to fame and fortune.

Our call was 6am on a Monday morning up in Canyon County, about 40 minutes north of where I live. When I got there it was still dark out, and I was led into a double wide trailer that housed the rest of my fellow contestants (21 in all, though normally there are supposed to be 24). We spent the first hour settling in, signing more forms and getting the rundown on how things would be handled throughout the day, including a verbal description of the course.

The first round would prune the initial twenty-four contestants to twelve, who would then proceed to the next round after lunch (with the rest being sent home). That following round would reduced the contestants to six players, who would come back later in the week to be pared down to three. And finally, the remaining three would show up the following Monday for an evening shoot of the final round.

Suffice to say I went home at the end of the first day, but I had an absolute blast while I was there. And it was easily the most physically demanding thing I have ever done in my life. The first time you hit the water isn’t that bad, but you have to remember you’re fully clothed with a bulky life jacket on and have to climb up a ladder to get the next obstacle. This gets exhausting IMMEDIATELY. Especially when you have to do it three more times before you reach the finish line.

The second round was a little more gentle as it wasn’t timed, but I still spent a ton of time in the drink, swimming back again and again in an attempt to overcome each phase of the obstacle course. I had one good shot at making it (which is shown in the episode), but sadly came up short. But as I said I had a great time and met a few people that I’d like to stay in touch with, so I can hardly complain.

I was planning to send them a video after the episode aired in an attempt to coerce them into doing a ‘Best of the Worst’ episode as an excuse to bring me back but got beaten to the punch as the following week’s episode was exactly that. At least it gives me hope that they might do another one in the future and I can snag myself some more face time on national television. :D

NTLive's 'Frankenstein'

Over the weekend I got a chance to see London’s National Theatre’s production of ‘Frankenstein’ through their NTLive program, which hosts viewings of their stage productions at various movie theaters around the world.  For prices that are often far below what you would pay to see a live production, you can see high quality theatre that would otherwise be completely inaccessible. 

The show was fantastic for a variety of reasons, which I shall touch upon in a moment, but my fascination was wrought primarily from the fact that I had never read the original novel by Mary Shelley.  My only knowledge of the Frankenstein mythos was basic concepts of the monster from film (most notably the 1931 version) and Mel Brooks’ Young Frankenstein.  Shocking, then, to discover the original creation intelligent and articulate, seeking to integrate itself into society and eventually seeking bloody vengeance against its creator when denied. 

The stage and lighting design were exceptional, with the stage consisting primarily of a circular platform split in two on a hydraulic lift, with each half occasionally disappearing into the depths of the floor to reappear shortly thereafter with different set pieces in place.  The lighting consisted primarily of a single, massive collection of light bulbs hanging above the stage like moss.  Hundreds, if not thousands, of lights beat with the action onstage, bursting brightly and then fading back into black.

The lead actors, Jonny Lee Miller and Benedict Cumberbatch, performed excellently in their respective roles, roles which they switched every other night, I might add.  I’d love to go back and see it again just for their different takes on the titular characters.  Sadly, not everyone performed to their level.  The actor playing the role of Frankenstein’s father was painfully bad, with a strange pitch to his voice that made listening to him an uncomfortable affair.  Combine that with a lack of emotion, and a number of scenes that should have come across as very powerful ended up being weak.

That said, it’s still very much worth going to see, so if there are still performances showing near you I highly recommend you go and see it before they rotate in another show.

Back in the Saddle Again

So for the first time in six years I’m going to be back on the stage as part of the cast of ‘Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson,’ specifically as John C. Calhoun. Rehearsals begin next week, which will toss me squarely into a very busy July.

My Fourth of July was quite lovely, with a trip down to Huntington Beach to celebrate with my girlfriend’s family. I gorged on delicious food, caught up with some friends and had the balsamic strawberry ice cream I made become a smashing success. I highly recommend you try if you’ve got a sweet tooth.

A busy bumble bee

Summer is once again upon its way, rife with opportunity and fresh produce.  While my tomato plants are doing their best impression of Jack’s fabled beanstalk, I’m finding any number of ways to keep busy. 

I finally finished shooting my “Joe’s House of Raccoon” video with the help of my roommate, leaving only the hours and hours of editing left to complete it.  I’m hoping to use tonight to grind out the entire project and have it posted later this week.

My girlfriend is holding auditions for 'Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson' this Saturday, and I’m busy hunting down monologues and baritone rock songs that I can perform.  Rehearsals start the week after the 4^th of July and run Monday to Wednesday through the first week of August.

I started taking Tango classes with my girlfriend two weeks ago and it’s turning out to be a lot of fun, even though we are still just learning the basics.  As with anything it requires practice, which I haven’t been doing, but I’m hoping to rectify that with ten or fifteen minutes a night.

The aforementioned garden (replete with tomatoes, cantaloupe, cucumbers, basil and mint) is coming along wonderfully, but still requires a lot of maintenance.  The new bed walls I put in weren’t close enough to the ground so soil has been seeping out underneath them, requiring me to go back and attached another round of planks further into the ground.  This, combined with the irrigation heads being broken and spewing water everywhere, has resulted in all sorts of weeds and grass growing outside of the vegetable beds which I’ve been diligently been pulling up in my spare time.

Dad will be showing up for his annual summer trip after the 4^th of July, and since he is now well and fully retired he’ll be out here for three weeks instead of the normal two.  I suspect that I’ll be seeing even more theatre than I already am while he’s in town, and will likely gain a few pounds as well.

Speaking of theatre, I’ve been on a tear as of late, seeing six different shows (Follies, The Tempest, Ivanov, Sleeper Agent, War Horse, and the current offering at Magnum Opus) in the last two weeks.  I wasn’t really impressed with Follies, but War Horse was especially good and should it ever make it to your neck of the woods I highly suggest you check it out.  The horse puppetry was AMAZING.